1
00:00:04,371 --> 00:00:08,942
* [Charles Gounod's
"Funeral March
of a Marionette"] *

2
00:00:42,375 --> 00:00:44,010
[door creaking]

3
00:00:45,845 --> 00:00:47,380
[continues creaking]

4
00:00:51,284 --> 00:00:53,920
There, that's better.
Much better.

5
00:00:56,056 --> 00:01:00,093
The least we can do
is to provide
the proper atmosphere.

6
00:01:00,126 --> 00:01:02,796
This is truly
an extraordinary item.

7
00:01:02,829 --> 00:01:05,865
Loud, squeaking fluid.

8
00:01:05,899 --> 00:01:09,536
It is also excellent
at making old shutters bang...

9
00:01:09,569 --> 00:01:13,073
and on dark nights
one can spray it
in the air in case...

10
00:01:13,073 --> 00:01:15,442
the wind isn't whistling
loud enough.

11
00:01:15,475 --> 00:01:17,510
It's very practical, too.

12
00:01:17,544 --> 00:01:20,080
It can make old shoes squeak
like new again.

13
00:01:21,715 --> 00:01:24,150
Now that we have established
our mood...

14
00:01:24,184 --> 00:01:28,621
I should like to tell you
that tonight's story
is by Ray Bradbury...

15
00:01:28,655 --> 00:01:31,558
and is known by
the provocative title of...

16
00:01:31,591 --> 00:01:33,259
"Shopping For Death."

17
00:01:51,311 --> 00:01:52,412
[tires screech]

18
00:01:52,445 --> 00:01:53,713
[crashing]

19
00:02:03,356 --> 00:02:06,426
Fifty miles an hour
along the main boulevard.
He must have been crazy.

20
00:02:25,445 --> 00:02:28,715
(woman)
Maybe he fell
or maybe he jumped.

21
00:02:28,748 --> 00:02:31,384
(woman)
One minute I saw him standing
up against the window...

22
00:02:31,418 --> 00:02:34,921
and then, I saw him
right between the window
and the ground.

23
00:02:34,954 --> 00:02:36,523
(man)
That's too bad.

24
00:02:41,995 --> 00:02:45,532
Somebody left
a cigarette burning.
That's what it was.

25
00:02:45,565 --> 00:02:46,666
[people chattering]

26
00:02:46,700 --> 00:02:48,702
A little thing like that.
Now look at it.

27
00:02:48,735 --> 00:02:50,370
Look at
the whole darn building.

28
00:02:55,241 --> 00:02:57,410
[children yelling]

29
00:03:00,080 --> 00:03:02,549
There, 989.

30
00:03:02,582 --> 00:03:06,119
[all chattering]

31
00:03:06,152 --> 00:03:08,888
That's where she lives.
Come, Elmer.

32
00:03:10,757 --> 00:03:16,463
Nice cold water.
Nice freezing cold water.

33
00:03:16,496 --> 00:03:18,331
[children chatter]

34
00:03:18,365 --> 00:03:21,568
Clarence,
why are we here?

35
00:03:21,601 --> 00:03:26,373
Why drag me off
day after day in
this hot, humid weather...

36
00:03:26,406 --> 00:03:27,907
to accidents and crimes?

37
00:03:27,941 --> 00:03:32,712
And now this infernal nonsense
about some woman
I've never even met.

38
00:03:32,746 --> 00:03:35,815
Why? We've got a job to do.
That's why.

39
00:03:36,883 --> 00:03:40,120
We owe it to ourselves,
to society, to be here.

40
00:03:40,153 --> 00:03:42,789
All our lives,
for almost 50 years...

41
00:03:42,822 --> 00:03:45,091
we've been
insurance salesmen, right?

42
00:03:45,091 --> 00:03:47,160
Right.
We've sold
millions of dollars...

43
00:03:47,193 --> 00:03:51,197
worth of insurance,
which has helped thousands
of needy people, right?

44
00:03:51,231 --> 00:03:54,934
Right.
Three months ago,
we retired, didn't we?

45
00:03:54,968 --> 00:03:57,837
We did.
But statistics prove--

46
00:03:57,871 --> 00:04:01,941
That retired men die sooner
than men who remain active.
Yes. I know.

47
00:04:02,042 --> 00:04:04,711
But, I'm for
sitting on the sidelines.

48
00:04:04,744 --> 00:04:06,813
Sidelines?

49
00:04:06,846 --> 00:04:09,349
Elmer,
how can you sit by...

50
00:04:09,382 --> 00:04:13,319
after seeing what you've seen
in the last three months?

51
00:04:13,353 --> 00:04:15,522
Now, that accident
with the truck...

52
00:04:15,555 --> 00:04:19,092
the man was driving too fast,
not watching where he went.

53
00:04:19,125 --> 00:04:22,095
And the man
who fell 12 stories...

54
00:04:22,128 --> 00:04:23,930
and the fire in
the warehouse...

55
00:04:23,963 --> 00:04:27,267
because somebody forgot
to put out a cigarette.

56
00:04:27,300 --> 00:04:30,670
All three of those men killed
by their own carelessness.

57
00:04:33,773 --> 00:04:35,075
Why?

58
00:04:36,176 --> 00:04:37,610
What's behind it?

59
00:04:39,112 --> 00:04:40,347
I want to know.

60
00:04:41,815 --> 00:04:42,882
I will know.

61
00:04:42,916 --> 00:04:44,951
[children chattering]

62
00:04:46,252 --> 00:04:50,090
There's so much
unhappiness around us.

63
00:04:50,123 --> 00:04:54,928
How can we refuse to help
even though we are retired?

64
00:04:54,961 --> 00:04:59,799
It's a little late to
help those men we saw.
Two please.

65
00:04:59,833 --> 00:05:03,236
Exactly.
But while there's time,
we can help others.

66
00:05:03,269 --> 00:05:06,306
Now this woman here
in this tenement:

67
00:05:06,339 --> 00:05:10,510
To see her is to know her.
She staggers the imagination.

68
00:05:10,543 --> 00:05:12,379
She's unbelievable.

69
00:05:12,412 --> 00:05:13,813
So are we.

70
00:05:13,847 --> 00:05:15,148
[groans]

71
00:05:16,282 --> 00:05:18,585
89 degrees.

72
00:05:18,618 --> 00:05:22,355
If folks around here
knew why we were here.

73
00:05:22,389 --> 00:05:24,858
Peeping Toms,
that's what they'd call us.

74
00:05:24,891 --> 00:05:26,259
[door shuts]

75
00:05:26,292 --> 00:05:27,660
[baby crying]
There she is now.

76
00:05:27,694 --> 00:05:29,396
(man)
Hey, have some
mercy down there.

77
00:05:29,429 --> 00:05:30,630
[shouts]

78
00:05:30,663 --> 00:05:32,432
[baby crying]

79
00:05:34,701 --> 00:05:36,403
You woke the baby.

80
00:05:36,436 --> 00:05:40,340
All right. So I woke it.
It keeps me awake
all night, don't it?

81
00:05:40,373 --> 00:05:42,942
Kid yells all night long.
Get out of the way!

82
00:05:44,911 --> 00:05:46,713
Come, Elmer. Quick.

83
00:05:49,215 --> 00:05:51,584
Give me some ice cream.

84
00:05:51,618 --> 00:05:53,987
I don't want that.
I want that one down there.

85
00:05:56,656 --> 00:05:58,591
What's the matter,
you see something funny?

86
00:05:58,625 --> 00:06:00,293
[laughing]

87
00:06:07,067 --> 00:06:12,539
Come on, get out of the way.
What you doing
blocking the entrance?

88
00:06:12,572 --> 00:06:14,074
Hey, move over.

89
00:06:19,212 --> 00:06:21,214
All right, move over.

90
00:06:21,247 --> 00:06:24,250
What you think you got
a line here, or something?

91
00:06:24,284 --> 00:06:26,720
I want a good hunk of meat.
Not too fat.

92
00:06:26,753 --> 00:06:28,188
Yes, ma'am.

93
00:06:28,221 --> 00:06:31,891
A good hunk.
Nothing spoiled. You hear?

94
00:06:31,925 --> 00:06:34,394
Yes ma'am.
Yeah, the stuff
you give me yesterday...

95
00:06:34,427 --> 00:06:37,397
I give to the cat,
so don't give me
no more like that. You hear?

96
00:06:37,430 --> 00:06:40,367
No, ma'am.
All right, what do you got?

97
00:06:40,400 --> 00:06:45,238
Isn't she classic?
Ever seen anything like her?

98
00:06:45,271 --> 00:06:47,540
How about brains?
You got any brains?
Yes, ma'am.

99
00:06:47,574 --> 00:06:48,475
Let me see.

100
00:06:50,744 --> 00:06:52,712
Give me some good, nice,
fresh beef brains.

101
00:06:53,847 --> 00:06:55,415
And make sure
they're fresh, too.

102
00:06:55,448 --> 00:06:58,785
I don't want none of
that yesterday's stuff.
You hear?

103
00:06:58,818 --> 00:07:01,388
Let's see
what you got there.

104
00:07:01,421 --> 00:07:05,125
Are them beef brains?
I don't want none of
them sheep brains. You hear?

105
00:07:05,158 --> 00:07:07,060
All right, come on now.

106
00:07:07,093 --> 00:07:10,196
Do me a favor,
keep your big fat thumbs
off the scale this time.

107
00:07:12,165 --> 00:07:14,934
All right, put a few more on.
Come on. What're you doing?

108
00:07:15,035 --> 00:07:17,037
Who do you think
you're cheating, anyway?

109
00:07:17,037 --> 00:07:18,271
Yes, ma'am.

110
00:07:18,304 --> 00:07:21,408
"Yes, ma'am. No ma'am."
You smart aleck.

111
00:07:21,441 --> 00:07:22,642
Look.

112
00:07:22,676 --> 00:07:25,178
All right. Come on.

113
00:07:25,211 --> 00:07:27,847
What are you standing?
You think I got all day,
or something?

114
00:07:27,881 --> 00:07:29,449
[knife clatters]

115
00:07:30,383 --> 00:07:31,651
Smart aleck.

116
00:07:34,754 --> 00:07:38,191
Yeah, thanks for nothing.
And charge it!

117
00:07:39,893 --> 00:07:40,960
(butcher)
Yes, gentlemen?

118
00:07:41,061 --> 00:07:43,363
[mumble]

119
00:07:43,396 --> 00:07:47,834
I forgot the list.
We'll be back. Come, Elmer.

120
00:07:47,867 --> 00:07:48,668
Goodbye.

121
00:07:54,307 --> 00:07:55,375
[car honks]

122
00:07:59,212 --> 00:08:01,247
[people chatter]

123
00:08:06,119 --> 00:08:08,855
Now do you see how much
she needs our help?

124
00:08:08,888 --> 00:08:10,256
She certainly does.

125
00:08:10,290 --> 00:08:13,393
But let's get away.
She's a destroyer, she is.

126
00:08:13,426 --> 00:08:17,364
No, Elmer.
Not a destroyer.

127
00:08:17,397 --> 00:08:20,900
She wants to be destroyed.

128
00:08:20,934 --> 00:08:23,236
Begs to be murdered...

129
00:08:23,269 --> 00:08:27,040
and if we don't help her,
her name will make
the obituaries.

130
00:08:27,040 --> 00:08:31,611
Obituaries. No.
Front page headlines
in the tabloid.

131
00:08:31,644 --> 00:08:32,746
Look at her.

132
00:08:35,048 --> 00:08:37,717
What you mean,
a pound and a half?
It said a pound and a quarter.

133
00:08:37,751 --> 00:08:40,286
Why don't you get
your scale fixed?
Don't be so smart!

134
00:08:43,656 --> 00:08:45,158
[car honks]

135
00:08:45,191 --> 00:08:49,229
Hey! Look out where
you're going! You crazy
in the head or something?

136
00:08:49,262 --> 00:08:51,164
What's the matter with you?

137
00:08:53,533 --> 00:08:55,535
Hey, come on.
Get out of here, kids.
Come on.

138
00:08:55,568 --> 00:08:57,904
Why don't you
go down the street and play?

139
00:08:57,937 --> 00:09:01,141
Do you have to hang around
here all the time?
Hey, you ain't got any homes?

140
00:09:01,174 --> 00:09:02,776
Go on home!

141
00:09:02,809 --> 00:09:05,245
I'd hate to have her
on my conscience.

142
00:09:07,547 --> 00:09:10,583
There's only one way
to approach her.

143
00:09:10,617 --> 00:09:14,754
Now I've studied her every day
for the past week.

144
00:09:14,788 --> 00:09:18,825
The direct approach
is the only approach.

145
00:09:18,858 --> 00:09:20,160
Come, Elmer.

146
00:09:23,029 --> 00:09:26,266
[people chattering]

147
00:09:34,774 --> 00:09:35,709
(woman)
That's a laugh!

148
00:09:35,742 --> 00:09:37,043
(man)
Shut up!

149
00:09:37,043 --> 00:09:38,278
(woman)
Hey, come on back here.

150
00:09:38,311 --> 00:09:39,479
Where do you think
you're going?

151
00:09:39,512 --> 00:09:41,047
You're gonna go to work,
I'll bet!

152
00:09:41,081 --> 00:09:44,150
I bet you're going to
go across to that bar
and get drunk! See if I care!

153
00:09:44,184 --> 00:09:46,720
Shut up!
Shut up or I'll....

154
00:09:48,722 --> 00:09:50,156
[thuds]

155
00:09:50,190 --> 00:09:54,928
Right here it is.
Mr. and Mrs. Albert Shrike,
apartment 321.

156
00:09:54,961 --> 00:09:58,365
How fitting. What a name.

157
00:09:58,398 --> 00:10:02,002
The butcher bird, shrike.

158
00:10:02,035 --> 00:10:03,503
[woman yelling]

159
00:10:03,536 --> 00:10:06,806
Listen to her.
And did you see the husband?

160
00:10:11,511 --> 00:10:16,816
I've seen enough
and I've heard enough to
make me feel like an old man.

161
00:10:16,850 --> 00:10:21,654
I'm dying.
It's a miserable,
hot, humid day.

162
00:10:21,688 --> 00:10:25,925
Living in a tenement
on a day like this
is living boiled alive.

163
00:10:25,959 --> 00:10:27,594
In a steam room.

164
00:10:27,627 --> 00:10:31,164
Why don't we open the door?
I'm dying of the heat.

165
00:10:31,197 --> 00:10:34,100
Dying. Yes.

166
00:10:34,134 --> 00:10:35,902
[baby crying]

167
00:10:35,935 --> 00:10:37,470
Killing weather.

168
00:10:38,638 --> 00:10:42,375
More murders are committed
at 92 degrees Fahrenheit...

169
00:10:42,409 --> 00:10:44,177
than at
any other temperature.

170
00:10:44,210 --> 00:10:46,212
Clarence,
I know the statistics.

171
00:10:46,246 --> 00:10:47,914
Yes,
and the police do, too.

172
00:10:47,947 --> 00:10:49,049
Come on.

173
00:10:49,082 --> 00:10:49,849
[groans]

174
00:10:51,217 --> 00:10:55,288
Under 90
men's tempers stay cool...

175
00:10:55,321 --> 00:10:58,024
but right at 92 degrees...

176
00:10:58,058 --> 00:11:00,360
we all turn irritable...

177
00:11:00,393 --> 00:11:01,394
itchy...

178
00:11:03,296 --> 00:11:04,464
out of sorts.

179
00:11:04,497 --> 00:11:06,299
[groaning]

180
00:11:08,968 --> 00:11:13,506
Hatred boils at this point.
The least thing...

181
00:11:13,540 --> 00:11:17,077
word, look, or sound...

182
00:11:17,110 --> 00:11:19,946
and irritable murder.

183
00:11:24,684 --> 00:11:26,419
<i>*[music playing]</i>

184
00:11:26,453 --> 00:11:29,656
No. Don't look at
the apartment numbers.

185
00:11:29,689 --> 00:11:32,692
I'll bet we can find
her apartment without--

186
00:11:32,726 --> 00:11:33,993
(woman)
Hey, stop them kids...

187
00:11:34,094 --> 00:11:35,829
from running around up there,
you hear me?

188
00:11:35,862 --> 00:11:37,364
(woman)
Hey, listen.

189
00:11:37,397 --> 00:11:39,132
[object thudding]

190
00:11:39,165 --> 00:11:40,500
Hello?

191
00:11:40,533 --> 00:11:42,002
(woman)
What's the matter...

192
00:11:42,102 --> 00:11:43,937
you can't give somebody
some peace down here
once in a while?

193
00:11:43,970 --> 00:11:45,438
Hello?

194
00:11:45,472 --> 00:11:49,509
Listen,
you keep them kids quiet
or I'm gonna call the police.

195
00:11:49,542 --> 00:11:51,444
Now I ain't kidding.
You hear me?

196
00:11:51,478 --> 00:11:53,246
And keep them quiet.

197
00:11:53,279 --> 00:11:54,314
<i>*[music playing]</i>

198
00:11:54,347 --> 00:11:56,383
What do you want?

199
00:11:56,416 --> 00:11:59,519
We came to--
Come on. Speak up.
I can't hear you!

200
00:11:59,552 --> 00:12:01,955
Could you turn down
the radio?

201
00:12:02,055 --> 00:12:04,324
Look, I ain't buying nothing.
So it ain't gonna
do you no good.

202
00:12:04,357 --> 00:12:06,826
Wait a minute.

203
00:12:06,860 --> 00:12:10,463
I told you
to keep those kids quiet
up there, didn't I?

204
00:12:10,497 --> 00:12:11,698
<i>[music stops playing]</i>

205
00:12:11,731 --> 00:12:13,867
Now, look,
I'm very busy...

206
00:12:13,900 --> 00:12:16,369
so make your pitch.

207
00:12:16,403 --> 00:12:20,073
My name is Clarence Fox.
This is Mr. Shore.

208
00:12:20,106 --> 00:12:22,442
How do you do?
We're retired
insurance salesmen.

209
00:12:22,475 --> 00:12:24,177
I don't need no insurance,
so go on.

210
00:12:24,210 --> 00:12:27,280
No. Money is not the reason
we came here today.

211
00:12:27,313 --> 00:12:29,783
Yeah, where have I
heard that one before?

212
00:12:29,816 --> 00:12:32,719
May we sit down?
I said I'm busy.
I got things to do.

213
00:12:32,752 --> 00:12:34,287
Thank you.

214
00:12:34,320 --> 00:12:36,990
[people chattering]

215
00:12:37,090 --> 00:12:40,727
You see,
now that we've retired...

216
00:12:40,760 --> 00:12:44,330
we're trying to find a way
to save people...

217
00:12:44,364 --> 00:12:50,003
profiting by the statistics
we learned while we were with
the insurance company.

218
00:12:50,103 --> 00:12:53,239
Too many people die before
they should, Mrs. Shrike.

219
00:12:53,273 --> 00:12:56,109
You got me scared.

220
00:12:56,109 --> 00:13:01,381
You see, we've thought we
might set up a new type of
service to help sick people.

221
00:13:01,414 --> 00:13:03,550
Who's sick?
I ain't sick.

222
00:13:03,583 --> 00:13:05,618
But you are.
Hey look,
don't tell me what I am.

223
00:13:05,652 --> 00:13:09,089
You know, people can be sick
and not know it...

224
00:13:09,122 --> 00:13:13,827
and our job is to
find those people
and warn them.

225
00:13:13,860 --> 00:13:17,697
Now, people are dying
every day.

226
00:13:17,731 --> 00:13:22,068
Why? They get tired.
They're not careful enough...

227
00:13:22,102 --> 00:13:25,071
and the result is
they really kill themselves.

228
00:13:25,105 --> 00:13:28,475
I don't kill myself.
Not if I can help it.

229
00:13:28,508 --> 00:13:29,876
(Clarence)
But you might.

230
00:13:31,177 --> 00:13:33,613
Here, let me
show you something.

231
00:13:34,547 --> 00:13:35,682
Now look.

232
00:13:37,817 --> 00:13:42,856
Now you see,
this light bulb hangs
right over the bathtub.

233
00:13:42,889 --> 00:13:47,494
Now, its wire is frayed,
the insulation worn off.

234
00:13:47,527 --> 00:13:50,497
Just one phone call
to the electrician...

235
00:13:50,530 --> 00:13:52,298
and he would
see to it right away.

236
00:13:54,100 --> 00:13:55,301
[baby crying]

237
00:13:55,335 --> 00:13:57,404
Now watch. Watch.

238
00:14:00,206 --> 00:14:01,441
[grunts]

239
00:14:01,474 --> 00:14:03,843
Look. Look.

240
00:14:05,045 --> 00:14:06,846
Here you are in the tub.

241
00:14:08,715 --> 00:14:10,884
Wet from head to foot.

242
00:14:10,917 --> 00:14:16,356
Now, you start to get out,
you slip, you grab.

243
00:14:16,389 --> 00:14:19,659
So, one more person dead.

244
00:14:23,830 --> 00:14:27,734
Clarence!
You must be careful.

245
00:14:27,767 --> 00:14:31,504
Yes. Thank you.
Elmer, thank you.

246
00:14:31,538 --> 00:14:32,739
Thank you.

247
00:14:34,074 --> 00:14:35,542
You see?

248
00:14:35,575 --> 00:14:39,813
You see,
people get lazy in
their habits every so often.

249
00:14:39,846 --> 00:14:43,383
They're not careful enough
about the way they do things.

250
00:14:43,416 --> 00:14:46,553
What's the light cord
got to do with me?

251
00:14:46,586 --> 00:14:48,088
I didn't make it that way.

252
00:14:48,088 --> 00:14:51,558
No. No.
But you left it that way.

253
00:14:51,591 --> 00:14:53,226
It could kill you.

254
00:14:53,259 --> 00:14:55,195
So? So I'm dead.

255
00:14:55,228 --> 00:14:57,564
So you're here for
the funeral early. Why?

256
00:14:57,597 --> 00:15:01,835
Why?
Your place is a death trap.

257
00:15:01,868 --> 00:15:04,637
Hey, listen there,
the landlord send you
to check up on us?

258
00:15:04,671 --> 00:15:07,173
No, no, no.

259
00:15:09,175 --> 00:15:13,380
Here now. Look.

260
00:15:13,413 --> 00:15:16,783
What?
This food should be
in an icebox.

261
00:15:16,816 --> 00:15:19,586
Haven't you ever heard
of botulism?

262
00:15:19,619 --> 00:15:21,788
What's that?
Food poisoning.

263
00:15:21,821 --> 00:15:25,258
Why, in this weather,
this heat....

264
00:15:25,291 --> 00:15:27,327
91 degrees.

265
00:15:27,360 --> 00:15:28,695
91 what?

266
00:15:28,728 --> 00:15:31,598
Hey, what's the matter
with your friend?
He been out in the sun?

267
00:15:31,631 --> 00:15:35,235
Yes. Yes, we all have.

268
00:15:35,268 --> 00:15:38,805
You have.
Everyone in this house has.

269
00:15:39,973 --> 00:15:42,709
Your husband,
wherever he is...

270
00:15:42,742 --> 00:15:46,379
right now he's getting
hotter and hotter.

271
00:15:46,413 --> 00:15:49,082
Well, you ain't
telling me nothing.

272
00:15:49,082 --> 00:15:50,083
[grunts]

273
00:15:51,985 --> 00:15:53,787
[stammers]
Hey, listen,
what you doing?

274
00:15:53,820 --> 00:15:55,789
[stammers]
You going around
the whole building...

275
00:15:55,822 --> 00:15:57,624
all the rooms,
making speeches?

276
00:15:57,657 --> 00:15:58,892
No, no.

277
00:15:58,925 --> 00:16:02,328
What? You come here
to my room?
Just to you.

278
00:16:02,362 --> 00:16:04,564
[stammers]
Why? What for?
What are you bothering me for?

279
00:16:04,597 --> 00:16:06,399
I want to help you.

280
00:16:06,433 --> 00:16:08,802
Yeah. That's rich.

281
00:16:08,835 --> 00:16:12,038
Now please listen to me
before it's too late.

282
00:16:12,038 --> 00:16:15,809
Now, we all
make mistakes in life, right?

283
00:16:15,842 --> 00:16:17,177
Yeah.

284
00:16:17,210 --> 00:16:21,715
We lose money, we get sick,
a million things
happen to hurt us...

285
00:16:21,748 --> 00:16:24,217
then we hate everybody.

286
00:16:24,250 --> 00:16:26,086
Yeah. Now you're talking
my language.

287
00:16:26,119 --> 00:16:27,921
We get mean.
Yeah, sure.

288
00:16:27,954 --> 00:16:33,893
We turn so mean,
we make people want to hit us.
Knock us down or worse.

289
00:16:33,927 --> 00:16:35,495
Maybe even kill us.

290
00:16:37,163 --> 00:16:40,233
Yeah. Go on, go on.

291
00:16:40,266 --> 00:16:43,937
Could we open
just one window here?

292
00:16:45,372 --> 00:16:48,074
I don't want
no window open in here.

293
00:16:48,074 --> 00:16:49,542
[baby crying]

294
00:16:49,576 --> 00:16:51,378
[stammers]

295
00:16:51,411 --> 00:16:54,814
Have you ever heard the term,
"accident-prone"?

296
00:16:56,182 --> 00:16:59,619
(Clarence)
It means people who are always
falling down stairs...

297
00:16:59,652 --> 00:17:03,556
breaking necks, arms, or legs.

298
00:17:03,590 --> 00:17:08,328
(Clarence)
Now, your subconscious mind
can make your hand slip...

299
00:17:08,361 --> 00:17:10,630
and cut yourself.

300
00:17:10,663 --> 00:17:16,870
It can make you
jaywalk in the street,
and-and maybe get run over.

301
00:17:16,903 --> 00:17:22,776
In other words,
each of us can be
the victim of ourselves.

302
00:17:22,809 --> 00:17:27,313
Well, what you do?
You go all over town
looking for people like this?

303
00:17:27,347 --> 00:17:29,649
Only in order to help them.

304
00:17:31,051 --> 00:17:35,321
You follow people?
You watch them, huh?

305
00:17:35,355 --> 00:17:37,157
Yes. To get facts.

306
00:17:38,224 --> 00:17:42,295
One man I watched,
fell from a 12-story building.

307
00:17:42,328 --> 00:17:45,165
Accident? No.

308
00:17:45,198 --> 00:17:48,068
'Cause secretly
he wanted to die.

309
00:17:48,101 --> 00:17:51,204
Another man forgot
to put out a cigarette.

310
00:17:51,237 --> 00:17:52,706
Burned himself up.

311
00:17:53,306 --> 00:17:55,642
Accident? No.

312
00:17:55,675 --> 00:17:58,178
He wanted to die, too.

313
00:17:58,211 --> 00:18:01,448
Evidence.
Evidence, I have lots of it.

314
00:18:01,481 --> 00:18:05,085
Scores of dead, injured,
while I stood by...

315
00:18:05,118 --> 00:18:07,821
and watched
unable to prevent it.

316
00:18:07,854 --> 00:18:09,155
Yeah.

317
00:18:09,189 --> 00:18:11,624
Now you been watching me?
Only in order to help.

318
00:18:11,658 --> 00:18:13,893
What you doing?
You having a ball
or something?

319
00:18:13,927 --> 00:18:16,629
Crawling around
the tenement district,
seeing how everybody lives?

320
00:18:16,663 --> 00:18:18,865
Who do you think you are?
You come sniffing around here!

321
00:18:18,898 --> 00:18:21,501
You don't like
nothing you see!
You're stupid!

322
00:18:21,534 --> 00:18:23,903
You telling everybody
what to do!
"Open the window," you say.

323
00:18:23,937 --> 00:18:26,740
"Let in a little fresh air."
Now open the window,
you let in the flies...

324
00:18:26,773 --> 00:18:30,844
and you're dead. You stupid!
"Turn down the radio" you say.
Why?

325
00:18:30,877 --> 00:18:34,047
Why? So I can hear
them trucks outside
and the kids yelling?

326
00:18:34,047 --> 00:18:36,049
Fix the leaky gas here. How?

327
00:18:36,049 --> 00:18:37,650
You want to lend me the money?
I'll fix it.

328
00:18:37,684 --> 00:18:40,387
Listen, I could fix
everything around here!
I could fix the whole place!

329
00:18:40,420 --> 00:18:43,256
I'll sweep the floor,
I'll make it real nice.

330
00:18:43,289 --> 00:18:46,559
Sweep the floor
and I'll put on
a nice clean dress.

331
00:18:46,593 --> 00:18:49,796
Wash the dishes,
I'll comb my hair!
I'll burn up all this junk!

332
00:18:49,829 --> 00:18:53,366
Burn up
all the junk around here!
Fix it all up real nice! Sure!

333
00:18:53,400 --> 00:18:54,901
Anything!
I'm gonna fix it all up.

334
00:18:54,934 --> 00:18:56,670
Only you got to
promise me something!

335
00:18:56,703 --> 00:18:59,205
You got to do
one thing for me.
You promise me one thing.

336
00:18:59,239 --> 00:19:00,573
Anything.

337
00:19:00,607 --> 00:19:03,643
Make me 20 years younger.
Can you do that, huh?

338
00:19:03,677 --> 00:19:07,147
And take about 40 pounds off
that slob of a husband I got.

339
00:19:07,180 --> 00:19:10,684
So he don't come home mad
or drunk or maybe both.

340
00:19:10,717 --> 00:19:14,387
And fix up this here place.
Fix it up so
I can't hear the neighbors...

341
00:19:14,421 --> 00:19:17,557
next door, upstairs,
and down there.

342
00:19:17,590 --> 00:19:19,793
[stammers]
And then give me
one of them air coolers.

343
00:19:19,826 --> 00:19:24,864
Or air conditioners,
so a person could
sleep at night!

344
00:19:27,200 --> 00:19:30,637
All during July,
August, and September!

345
00:19:30,670 --> 00:19:33,940
I understand your problem.
Baloney!

346
00:19:34,040 --> 00:19:38,311
You don't understand the nose
on your face! You stupid....

347
00:19:40,146 --> 00:19:41,848
[baby crying]

348
00:19:41,881 --> 00:19:43,717
What do you think
you know about me?

349
00:19:43,750 --> 00:19:46,619
Come on.
What do you think you know?

350
00:19:46,653 --> 00:19:49,322
I'm 45 years old.
Is that a crime?

351
00:19:51,191 --> 00:19:54,728
I used to be 30 and then,
I was 20...

352
00:19:54,761 --> 00:19:56,863
and I was nice looking then,
too.

353
00:19:56,896 --> 00:20:00,700
No kidding. I could show you
some people that knew me then.

354
00:20:00,734 --> 00:20:02,736
You're so stupid. You go on.

355
00:20:02,769 --> 00:20:05,772
Tell me something about myself
I don't know already. Go on.

356
00:20:05,805 --> 00:20:08,808
I don't know how to proceed.

357
00:20:08,842 --> 00:20:10,810
Now come on!

358
00:20:10,844 --> 00:20:13,513
You're so smart!
Tell me something
I don't know!

359
00:20:13,546 --> 00:20:16,916
Get out of here! Old man!
You dirty, miserable old man!

360
00:20:16,950 --> 00:20:18,184
You need us!

361
00:20:18,218 --> 00:20:20,487
I don't need nobody.
I give up needing nobody
a long time ago!

362
00:20:20,520 --> 00:20:22,088
But--

363
00:20:22,122 --> 00:20:25,058
I don't need
no stinking old man
following me around!

364
00:20:25,091 --> 00:20:26,393
See here, now,
Mrs. Shrike!

365
00:20:26,426 --> 00:20:28,795
Don't Mrs. Shrike me,
you old....

366
00:20:28,828 --> 00:20:30,430
[exclaims]

367
00:20:30,463 --> 00:20:32,866
Clarence! Clarence!

368
00:20:32,899 --> 00:20:34,968
Please, Clarence, calm--

369
00:20:39,072 --> 00:20:40,674
What you doing?

370
00:20:40,707 --> 00:20:42,842
What are you
doing that for?

371
00:20:42,876 --> 00:20:45,245
What's the matter?
You trying to kill me,
or something?

372
00:20:45,278 --> 00:20:47,547
I never done nothing to you!
What's the matter with him?

373
00:20:47,580 --> 00:20:50,617
Is he crazy, or something?
He tried to kill me!
Did you see that?

374
00:20:50,650 --> 00:20:54,054
Let's get out of here.
You're a witness, you seen it.

375
00:20:54,087 --> 00:20:57,123
[stammers]
He tried to kill me!
That was almost murder.

376
00:20:57,157 --> 00:21:01,127
Hey, murder!
Police! Hey, murder!

377
00:21:06,066 --> 00:21:11,271
Did you see what I did?
I came so close.

378
00:21:11,304 --> 00:21:14,207
So very close.

379
00:21:15,175 --> 00:21:18,511
That poor woman. She's right.

380
00:21:18,545 --> 00:21:21,314
I'm a fool. An old fool.

381
00:21:21,348 --> 00:21:23,083
You better forget it.

382
00:21:23,083 --> 00:21:25,452
Forget? How?

383
00:21:26,319 --> 00:21:29,756
My pride didn't let me
save that woman.

384
00:21:29,789 --> 00:21:31,224
My pride.

385
00:21:31,257 --> 00:21:34,527
I treated her as a fascinating
kind of specimen...

386
00:21:34,561 --> 00:21:37,497
when I should have seen her
as a lost soul.

387
00:21:37,530 --> 00:21:40,100
A human being
in need of understanding.

388
00:21:41,267 --> 00:21:45,105
All I had to do
was put my hand out
to touch her.

389
00:21:45,105 --> 00:21:49,576
She never would have felt it.
Wouldn't she?

390
00:21:49,609 --> 00:21:54,781
We'll never know now.
And it's all my fault.

391
00:21:54,814 --> 00:21:58,118
Maybe, we better go
to her husband.

392
00:21:58,118 --> 00:22:03,056
No, Elmer.
No, it's too late.

393
00:22:04,057 --> 00:22:05,258
Poor Mrs. Shrike.

394
00:22:07,060 --> 00:22:09,829
Poor doomed woman.

395
00:22:16,336 --> 00:22:19,806
I still think
we ought to
talk to her husband.

396
00:22:19,839 --> 00:22:21,775
Tell him how she feels.

397
00:22:21,808 --> 00:22:23,143
[car honking]

398
00:22:23,176 --> 00:22:25,145
Elmer. He wouldn't....

399
00:22:40,927 --> 00:22:44,130
What's that hanging
from his belt in back?

400
00:22:44,164 --> 00:22:45,999
A longshoreman's hook.

401
00:22:47,100 --> 00:22:48,435
Elmer.

402
00:22:48,468 --> 00:22:50,937
Elmer,
what's the temperature now?

403
00:22:54,774 --> 00:23:00,347
Ninety-two.
Ninety-two degrees Fahrenheit
right on the nose.

404
00:23:00,380 --> 00:23:03,516
[siren wailing]

405
00:23:10,123 --> 00:23:11,658
[people chattering]

406
00:23:39,586 --> 00:23:45,625
You needn't sit there staring.
We're not going to
show you anymore.

407
00:23:45,658 --> 00:23:49,529
In fact,
I'm not even going to
tell you what happened.

408
00:23:49,562 --> 00:23:54,434
Television audiences
are becoming
entirely too dependent.

409
00:23:54,467 --> 00:23:56,803
You expect us
to do everything for you.

410
00:23:56,836 --> 00:23:59,639
This oil is terribly difficult
to get rid of.

411
00:23:59,673 --> 00:24:01,441
[creaking]

412
00:24:03,410 --> 00:24:07,080
Next week at this same time,
I hope to see you again.

413
00:24:07,113 --> 00:24:09,182
Good night.

414
00:24:11,151 --> 00:24:14,154
* [Charles Gounod's
"Funeral March
of a Marionette"] *